Friday, March 20, 2020

Be True to Yourself



Yesterday was a great day at home. Our kids helped in the yard, we cleaned up the firepit, trimmed some trees, and absorbed the sun. Yesterday I wrote a post that hit a few chords of "sensitivity" with some of my readers. Thank you for your feedback and unfollow. It was a blessing.

I have been so afraid for years, while writing this blog, to be myself out of fear of offending someone or having others feel attacked. I am mindful of the power of my words and how others might interpret my writing. This fear has held me back, it has created a weird bubble. Yesterday I laughed so hard when I read the harsh "words" thrown at me for a simple sentence of frustration, and belief. It was my opinion. I have been afraid to write my truth. My understanding of my belief system and value system. I fucking hate the power of fear and how it can control our lives.

So today is a new day. This virus, your comment (I'm looking at you anonymous reader) has given me a new lease on life and my words. I don't give a fuck. I am entitled to my own value system and my own opinion. I am allowed to be myself, even on this platform. I am not writing to make anyone feel better about their political views or belief system. I am a firm believer in being true to yourself, but for some reason, I lost that with this blog. I lost my voice. I lost my value system because I was trying to be neutral. I was trying to protect my abuser. I was trying to protect a family of narcissistic bullies. I was trying to be liked.  I don't care if you like me or not. This blog is for people who enjoy food, art, travel, love life, who have a community mentality, who love their neighbors, who value others' differences, who are inclusive, and who don't get offended because I don't believe exactly as you do.

My experiences have brought me to who I am today. Just like your experiences have brought you to where you are. I have lived through tragedy, illness, death, job loss, religious crisis, and mental health issues...just like so many of the people around me and here. These are the things that make us different, that mold us, and allow us to be EMPATHETIC to others.

So kids, listen. Listen and learn. People will judge you your whole life for doing everything. EVERYTHING! Develop an idea that "you do you" and "they do them"...then accept differences. Enjoy the uniqueness that we each are allowed to be. Find those people who accept and love you for being true to you. You will attract your community if you let others see the true YOU. This does not mean you have to sacrifice your self to please others. It is not our job to worry about what others think about your choices. I have spent my whole life worrying about how my actions will affect others to the point that it has paralyzed me. If THEY feel uncomfortable...they leave. If THEY don't like what you say...they leave or unfollow.  We are responsible for our own actions, and there will be consequences, but THEY are in charge of changing, leaving, setting limits, and going elsewhere too. I have had to do this myself. It's called adulting and sometimes it is the hardest decision and others times it is a feeling of relief. We are in charge of being the best we can, learning from others, and listening to our value system. Correcting any flaws we have. Changing any harm we do to others. It's a system of giving and taking.

There are people who are just givers and there are takers. Learn the difference in others and find the balance in yourself. Be true to yourself and your community will rise out of the ashes.

Hang in their friends and thank you for the comments.


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